Attack Choppers: Congratulations

Showing posts with label Congratulations. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Open comment to a certain gentlemen who shall remain nameless...

... but who's initials are J.O.

I am VERY excited to hear about the resurrection of your motorcycle and the new intake manifold.

I'm sure that congratulations from some know-nothing, dirty Midwestern kid are not all that important in your universe ... but I offer them anyway.

Bird

My chopper manifesto

I do not accept the assumption that a rigid framed motorcycle cannot go fast, stop quickly, or handle well. I want my choppers to perform above the social accepted performance standard for rigid framed motorcycles; (that is to say: BAD)
These are the standards I have set before myself to achieve with said choppers:

My choppers must be able to Evade, Pursue, and allow me to survive.
My choppers must be light.
My choppers must be skinny and be able to navigate tight traffic with ease.
My choppers must go fast, accelerate hard, stop well, handle good, and do so without fusing my vertabrae.
My choppers must not scrape hard parts when leaning.
My choppers are not bar hoppers.
My choppers are not non-functioning scuplture.
My choppers must function like a real, useable vehicle.
My choppers must be a valid mode of transportation.
My choppers must not be built for other peoples enjoyment or entertainment.
My choppers must be built for me and my preferences and standards alone.
My choppers must not be fragile.
My choppers must be able to hop curbs, hit potholes, skid, wheelie, do burn outs and crash without breaking.
My choppers must be able to be ridden on all sufaces (Pavement, dirt, gravel, snow, sand, mud)